Butterfly Sparks Designs

Wednesday, February 10, 2010

Don't be afraid...

Hi friends,

I'm sitting in the reclining chair at the chemo office today. Round #11. Eight months ago today the big "c" word entered my life. I can't grasp all that we've walked through, the victories we've experienced, nor the battles still to come. I am in awe of His faithfulness.

I'm all alone on this end of the room. Lots of people have come and gone throughout the day - but I'm one of the last to finish up. I'm feeling a little sad today. Just found out that one of the ladies I have shared many chemo hours with passed away last week.

Have I told you how much I hate cancer? I really hate it.

Even though I am saddened by her passing, I am grateful for the privilege of having known her in probably the most difficult season of her life. She was sweet and kind and encouraging. A good fighter. Her death is a reminder that this battle is so real.

This morning I was reading in Joshua about how he leads the people to take the promised land. In one section, Joshua is about to direct them on the strategy to take another city and He begins by telling them "Don't be afraid. Don't be discouraged (see Joshua 10:25). It caught my eye that this was exactly what God said first to Joshua. (see Joshua 1, and Joshua 8:1) Joshua begins to instruct the people by first repeating what God had said to him in private.

It seems in a great battle, we must be reminded of what not to be - afraid or discouraged - and we would be wise to declare and repeat the promise and instruction of God to those who walk with us. We are to be brave, courageous and encouraged.

Today I choose to be brave, courageous and encouraged - I don't feel it - but I choose it.

There are great battles on the horizon for you and for me. Battles that will determine where and how we abide. Battles that effect the legacy we leave our children. Battles that can bring glory to God - enough to melt the heart of our enemies by His reputation alone.

Let's not draw back before the sword is even drawn. I want my inheritance - don't you? Don't be afraid. Don't be discouraged. Let's stand up and take the land.

Jan

PS My mother in law - Molly - is in the hospital. You might remember that she is battling a health crisis of her own. She continues to struggle and is physically declining. Decisions about her care and treatment are being made. Please pray for my husband, Mark and my sister in law, Julie as they navigate such painful waters. I sat with Molly last night and she is "sharp as a tack", so to speak. Completely able to communicate both her history and her situation. In the midst of a very difficult day, she did not fail to immediately tell me she remembered my chemo appointment today. She prays for me daily. An example of beauty under pressure - a godly woman!

4 comments:

Kelly Allsopp said...

Love you and praying with and for you today!

Kelli Jones said...

Hi Jan! We haven't met in person yet (I'm kind of new to Gateway) but I hope someday to have the honor. You commented on a blog post I did on Destiny in Bloom one day and I started following you on Twitter. I immediately felt a heart connection to you when I read about your journey a few weeks back. I'm not really sure why (maybe because we both have 4 kids :)) but I just felt a burden to pray for you. I just wanted you to know that you are prayed for and loved even by people you don't know (yet)!
"Find rest, O my soul, in God alone; my hope comes from him.
He alone is my rock and my salvation; he is my fortress, I will not be shaken. My salvation and my honor depend on God; he is my mighty rock, my refuge. Trust in him at all times, O people; pour out your hearts to him,for God is our refuge." Psalm 62:5-8

Mary Jo Pierce said...

I want to cry. Is it because I am so proud of you. I am. Is it for the faceless nameless warriors. Yes. Is it for the Molly's ... that too. I have a buried bucket of tears.

Love you, Mary Jo

Unknown said...

Thank you, Jan. You encouraged me today. Praying for you continually. Gaye Lynn